Life is Grand!!!

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Water Off A Duck's Back

My hubby often times tells me that I can be to sensitive...to everything! This includes the times he says or does something wrong and I won't just let it go immediately and forget out it. I'm just supposed to get over it and move on instead of dealing with the problem.

I also get a bit ruffled when people criticize me. This past Sunday my mom made a sarcastic comment about a shirt I was wearing (which happens to be one of my hubby's favorite shirts). It was really mean of her, but I couldn't just let it roll off my back. I made an equally sarcastic comment back (something about how at least my shirt isn't so ugly that you are giving me your credit card to get a new one...which she did for my sis about 2 weeks ago), but I couldn't forget what she said. My hubby told me once again to get over it, but I am still dwelling on it. I now have to be careful what I wear around her so I don't get criticized again.

I take anything that is said to me very personal. One of my love languages is words of affirmation, so when I hear a mean comment about myself, it hits pretty hard. I knew I shouldn't let people affect me like this, but I can't help it.

So my question to you is, when you do let a rude comment just slide off your back? All the time? When is it okay to retaliate (if ever)? And is it okay for me to want to deal with an issue/comment instead of letting it just slide?


(Btw, my hubby just surprised me by dropping off Walk the Line on DVD!!! He went out early this morning and bought it for me!!! How sweet! Thank you honeybabe!!!)

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Blogger Princess21 said...

This is a toughy....I deal with this as well. But you can't let them get to you or they won!!! And you know how I feel about loosing!!! :)

Ok, I am an extreemly sarcastic person and when I feel threatened or critized I usually break out the sarcasm. But this is not alwaya a good thing.

What if they did not mean it to be harmful?? What if it came out wrong???

Love keeps no record of wrongs....something I am learning to do!!! I did not say it...God did!

By the way...I luv your shirt!!

February 28, 2006 9:45 AM

 
Blogger Captain Berk said...

If I take offence to an officers comments, I say straight away that it's bothering me. That way I don't get worked up over it later.

February 28, 2006 11:39 AM

 
Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

I can get annoyed very easy. My phaser can start going right away.

February 28, 2006 3:14 PM

 
Blogger Shelley said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

February 28, 2006 3:26 PM

 
Blogger Shelley said...

I removed my previous comment because I had a funny typo that I would have to explain...HAHAHA!!! Seriously, it's just cold typing fingers!

Re: Rude people and comments, awww hon, this rots. I try my best to not let anything like that bother to me. It's hard, but try to think positive. Usually people severely rude have nothing else to live for except for others' misery, so I actually feel sorry for them. EXCEPT in the case of our mothers. What makes them think they can say whatever they want to us, not matter how hurtful? Hang in there. I get pretty peturbed by people at work...and my hubby can drive me sometimes...but really, life's too short to carry around that crap. ENJOY THE REST OF YOUR DAY!

February 28, 2006 3:28 PM

 
Blogger Cinthia said...

I have the same problem dealing with criticism as well. I tend to take anything anyone says about me personally.

What we should be doing is to try to think of any criticism that comes our way as constructive criticism, which will help us improve ourselves. The other thing we could do is to keep our sense of humor. If someone is really out to hurt us, then we should learn to laugh about it instead of getting worked up over it.

At the end of the day, we'll be happier and we won't spend the night awake ruminating over every little comment that's been made that day!

February 28, 2006 3:34 PM

 
Blogger Texas_Ivy10 said...

I'm one of those people that can just let things slide. I try to teach my kids to not be so sensitive to other people opinions about them... especially negative opinions. I would have just said "oh that's too bad, I love this shirt" or something to that effect (or made a joke about it) and left it alone. If you like the shirt, it's all good!

Opinions are like a**holes... everyone has one... right?!! LOL

February 28, 2006 4:01 PM

 
Blogger DayByDay4-2Day said...

I'll be back to comment.

February 28, 2006 9:17 PM

 
Blogger Better Safe Than Sorry said...

i guess it depends what's being said and by whom. i can't imagine my mother ever saying anything rude to me like that, i would be devasted, mostly because she's my mom, moms shouldn't say stuff like that. she might not be aware of what she's doing, instead of saying some back to her, i would probably have asked her why she said that, and that i felt it was hurtful.

February 28, 2006 9:37 PM

 
Blogger Chrixean said...

We have the same love language, so it really is a big deal for me to constantly get affirmation by people around me. I am guilty of this "fault/flaw" as well. I easily get hurt by nasty comments (whether intentional or not), but knowing my personality, I NEVER let anything just roll off me without letting the person know first that he / she said something hurtful. But what I do now is think first of whether the person who said these things is actually someone important to me or not. By doing this, I am able to limit my negative reactions. If it's a good friend or a loved one, I get deeply hurt and I need time to heal before I can tell the person how I felt. But when it's someone I don't really care about or know, I just let the whole thing slide because his/her opinions don't matter to me.

Hope i helped...in some tiny way, hehe.

March 01, 2006 3:56 AM

 
Blogger Jake Silver said...

I read something somewhere that said negative comments always really reflect the person giving them more than the person they are talking to. So I don't mind when people make them because they are revealing their weaknesses to me. Muhahahahaha!

March 01, 2006 5:10 AM

 
Blogger deputyswife said...

It used to bother me when people made a comment I thought was rude. I mean really bother me. Then I was getting so parinoid and was reading into what people were saying. Then I got sick of it. Sick of wondering what people thought or was saying about me.

In the last five years or so, I just blow it off. Maybe it comes with age. I don't know. Sometimes, things still get to me, but I remind myself to leave it alone. And I try to think of something else.

Another thing, if someone tells me something like what your mom said, I tell them if it hurt my feelings. That usually puts them in their place.

March 01, 2006 5:22 PM

 
Blogger Trinity13 said...

I am really trying to remember that love keeps no record of wrongs PJ, but it's so hard!

Hmmm, maybe I should try that Captain Berk, thanks!

Very funny Capt!

My mother can be too honest Shelley. I should talk to her about it, but I don't think it will help.

There is a time once a month where I don't have much of a sense of humor Cinthia...heehee!

I love the shirt Texas, but I hate it that my mom doesn't. I don't know why I let her affect me so. (Btw, I love your holes comment...very funny!!!)

Thanks Day!

I should have asked her BSTS...I might just ask her tonight.

Right Chrixean, how are people supposed to know they really hurt me if I get over things quickly???

Hmmmm, great point Jake! Thanks!!!

I hope I can too just blow off rude comments DW. I'm working on it though!

March 02, 2006 11:49 AM

 
Blogger Becky said...

I honestly smart right back, which I realize is probably not always the most mature way to handle it. However, sometimes the right "zing" shuts that person up for a while and it's all worth it.

March 02, 2006 11:57 PM

 
Blogger Trinity13 said...

I'm not good with zings Becky...I should work on it!

March 03, 2006 9:11 AM

 

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